Beware the strange animal

I'd just like to say, I'm proud of the british people.

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 20:40:59 GMT

I seem to be really politicised at the moment, but listen to those boos. Well done, Question Time Audience.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8321491.stm

Well done, non-violent and angry protestors.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8321199.stm

The true voice of britain, demonstrating against fascism.

Thank you, BBC, for allowing these people an opportunity to express how much they hate the BNP in front of a national audience.

A paid writing job!

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 07:54:11 GMT

Kinda.

I have fourteen days to write a bunch of short articles on the subject of 'self hypnosis.' For this I will be paid $200.00. Money is a good thing, more would be nicer.
.
As far as I can tell, these are destined to go onto some website or series of websites built by a marketing company in the states. My only guide in this journey is Dave, an observer from my own time who- oh, sorry, that's from Quantum leap.

If you get spam from a self-hypnosis company in three years time, you'll know who to thank!

Charlie Brooker stokes my burning flames of rage with his wonderful nuggetts of word-coal

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 14:32:10 GMT

This is an email I sent. I seem to have become angry about journalistic issues associated with a boyband member's death. I needn't bore you with the details if you don't want.

Dear Press Complaints Commission

RE: Jan Moir's article on the Daily Mail's website dated 17 October 2009, 'a strange, lonely, troubling death' (url ref: http://dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-120756/A-strange-lonely-troubling-death.html)

Just in case any points I noticed have been been missed in the inevitable storm of rage at this woman's recent article, I'd like to submit these points:

1: Accuracy.

I'll just take some quotes, shall I?

'Something is terribly wrong with the way this incident has been shaped and spun into nothing more than an unfortunate mishap on a holiday weekend, like a broken teacup in the rented cottage'

It has NOT been represented as a casual mishap, it has been represented as a tragic accident that cruelly robbed a successful young man of the rest of his life, devastating his family, colleauges and friends.

'Healthy and fit 33-year-old men do not just climb into their pyjamas and go to sleep on the sofa, never to wake up again.'

Yes they do. Tragically, sadly, awfully, people die in unexpected ways every week. This can be due to previously undiagnosed heart conditions or any number of other medical complications.

'As a gay rights champion, I am sure he would want to set an example to any impressionable young men who may want to emulate what they might see as his glamorous routine.'

Her article itself states that he was reluctantly 'outed' as gay. I respectfully suggest that this woman stop putting words into a dead man's mouth.

'Let us be absolutely clear about this. All that has been established so far is that Stephen Gately was not murdered.'

No, that is NOT all that has been established. I can confidently state that he did not die of AIDS, get abducted by Aliens, shoot himself, get decapitated in a bizarre gardening accident, try to ingest a fully functional and running chainsaw, or foolishly attempt to headbutt Chuck Norris. To me that line reads like a blatant attempt at insinuation, the attempt to plant the idea in the reader that murder was ever even suspected without actually saying so.

2 Right to Reply. I would suspect that neither this woman or anyone else associated with the Daily Mail did not have the courage to phone either Steven Gately's family or anyone associated with them to see what they had to say about the idea they were 'spinning' the truth to protect either their son's reputation, or their own. Perhaps this is because phrases like 'outrageous' and 'if you print that filth, you'll hear from our lawyers' would not have sat well with the overall tone of the piece.

5. Intrusion into grief or shock.

Just leave his family alone. The assertion that his mother is somehow lying, either to herself or others, or otherwise obfuscating the truth about his death, is nothing short of appalling. And what about Andrew Cowles? This man has lost his husband, and Jan Moir is speculating about his unwitting complicity in the man's death.

12. Discrimination, both subsections.

The wanton linking of this man's death with the death of Kevin McGee is insulting on so many levels. I am especially appalled by the insistence that this 'strikes another blow to the happy-ever-after myth of civil partnerships.'

Oh really. Did Bill Clinton and John Major's alleged infidelities somehow 'strike a blow to the myth' that powerful men can have successful marriages?

Her blatant shoe-horning of as many names of prominently known homosexuals (Elton John and David Furnish, Kevin McGee and of course George Michael) into her article reeks of prejudice. How is George Michael's lifestyle relevant to Steven Gately's? I'm heterosexual, does that mean people can draw conclusions about my lifestyle from the behaviour of Liam Gallagher, or Steven Hawking? Hey, hang on, Steven Hawking is disabled and he left his wife! Maybe by Jan Moir's pathetic twisted logic, disabled people can't have valid marriages either!

The notion that somehow because two people who happened to be homosexual and married (well, one was divorced actually, but never let's not look at the facts here- Jan Moir clearly hasn't) have both died recently, ALL homosexuals are somehow tainted by association, is as glaring an example of a logical fallacy, nay, sheer idiocy as I have seen in a VERY long time indeed. I'd express it in the syllogistic terms every philosophy undergraduate knows, but you'd probably think I was being pretentious. So I won't- I don't want anything to detract from the point I'm making about HOW DISINGENUOUS, HATEFUL, AND DEVOID OF HUMAN KINDNESS THIS ARTICLE IS.

Jan Moir even mentions Elton John who, if you want to take a famous example of a homosexual man, who seems to be the perfect example of a man who lived a fairly hedonistic lifestyle (I believe it was him who once said to Q magazine that 'we flew over the Alps and I thought "that's all the Coke I've snorted") finding a certain stability in his life through a relationship. I don't see any attempt at balance here at all in the piece.

I would like the Press Complaints Commission to investigate these allegations and bring the fullest possible sanctions they can, both legal and financial, to the fullest extent of the law, against the Daily Mail, the Editor of the Daily mail, and the author of the article.

Goodness gracious me

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 20:33:34 GMT

Pterodactyl porn exists. That is all.

The day after a larp event, and not everything hurts.

Mon, 12 Oct 2009 09:26:52 GMT

Monstering the Jackals' event was fun. It was in Oxfordshire, so it was good to go through there and feel all nostalgic. As I don't really have a base there anymore with my father having relocated up north to Wendsleydale, I haven't been back there all that much, so that was good- something about the shape of the land and the trees that grow on it felt very nice and familiar.

It also turned out that a load of people who hadn't been to a larp event in ages were there, and that too was fantastic. One of those (who I knew about in advance) was Ben, who I've conspired to not see for about two years (ridiculous oversight on my part) so that was good. It was also pretty cool to see everyone else who was there, although as some friends were playing I didn't get to see everyone as much as we would have liked. There were also a few people kicking around in the monster crew who I kind of knew a bit, but had more of a chance to talk to and get to know, which was very nice.

I'm at Ben's now, which has been cool. After the event I had a chance to watched him do some horsemanship stuff for a friend, which I don't know much about. I do really enjoy watching someone who is really immersed in something and really good at it too. Then it was back to his new house for sitting down, and pigeon stew with him and Lou. A very nice larp comedown indeed. There'll be more visiting today then back on up to Edinburgh on the train.

I'm looking forward to more of this kind of thing in the not too distant future too, I think. No more Larp events for me for a while, but as long as money sorts itself out (it's looking like things will even out soon, and Allie will be able to get herself a better job once some visa things change) then more visits should happen, I think. Might be the other side of Christmas, but we'll see how it goes. Anyone is, of course, welcome to pop on up to Edinburgh any time- it's beautiful in Autumn.

One day, I will say these EXACT words in a court of law...

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 11:15:36 GMT

http://www.asofterworld.com/index.php?id=488

We are Gathered here today...

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 11:21:52 GMT

or, well, last weekend.

I was back to the Gathering, having missed last year. It felt strange, having not been to a LT event in two years, and consequently having not seen a bunch of people I always see there, in the intervening time.

It was good- a long, long journey towards the site, getting in at about half eleven on the friday night to discover that all the cool kids with cars had arrived at pretty much exactly the same time.

A bit of getting shit together, and a drunken Shanks appeared.

Just like old times, really.

Highlights of the weekend involved revelations about Derren Brown, award-winning pie, What's the Time Mr Wolf, now with added Werewolf, drumming mania, corpse puppetry, and finally our surreal final musical procession to the ritual circle, singing 'Goodbye Erdreja' as Shanks, the crew, and the Lizards finally walked away into the sunset at time-out on Sunday night.

more importantly, it was wonderful to meet some nice new people, and see others I haven't seen in ages. It made me rediscover my keen for the wonderful world of Larp, and made me realise that it's just getting on a bus, train, or plane, god dammit. going to see people isn't that hard.

next weekend- family wedding in London. 11th-20th, Philadelphia. 9th-11th October, there's the Jackals event in Oxfordshire. I've got some holiday left for the year. I think I'll take a couple of days off round then, visit people in that part of the world if that would work?

Rich stole this song from the Beatles, I'm stealing it back...

Fri, 17 Jul 2009 07:53:08 GMT

(bonus points for anyone who knows the cringeworthy origin of that quote above).

So Rich is making mixtapes for people, based on the following criteria; list five bands/songs/artists that you love, and three that you hate. The first ten people who respond get a tailor-made mix tape, in CD or downloadable form.

I think I'll do that too.

Rich, you can have one for definite. seems only fair.

On the ten-year Glastonbury Anniversary, too...

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 19:36:06 GMT

Apparently, this is an urban legend and totally untrue!

Strange, the things which catch you off guard

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 23:13:20 GMT

http://www.nme.com/blog/index.php?blog=10&title=steven_wells_rage_in_peace&more=1&c=1&tb=1&pb=1

That's an obituary of Steven Wells, who was amongst the most amusing and inspiring of the music journalists I remember reading when I was younger and more intense, and when I really, really cared about music to what seems like an almost pathological degree. Honestly, I look back on the way I felt about bands I loved, and bands I hated, with a weird mixture of embarrassment and pride, mingled with the thought that I might have lost something, an edge which probably made a lot of things harder, but was, in its own spiky way, admirable.

Steven Wells was awesome. He raged, he loved, he hated, and he always made me laugh when eviscerating some terrible band in the NME. I hadn't really thought about him or his writing in a long time, and now he's dead and it seems like I can say 'I read his stuff, when I was young.' My god, when did that happen? I always thought somehow I'd be writing by now, and thought that writing with that kind of passion would be a thing that was somehow within my reach. I haven't done it. I'm not sure why but I suspect it boils down to laziness and a lack of focus. Have to do something about that.

I didn't realise he directed a Manics video. I've just listened to half the Holy Bible at eleven o'clock at night now.

Steven Wells RIP.

All of a sudden I miss everyone

Sun, 19 Apr 2009 18:22:25 GMT

I've just had the most hectic week- A friend of Allie's has been visiting from America since Sunday, and so I've been out almost every night this week, showing two very lovely Connecticut-ites (-ians? -oids?) round Edinburgh, showing them where you can buy Haggis, finding interesting bands to go see, drinking in the town, finding haggis, going to pub quizzes, showing them where Arthur's Seat was, and being on hand to tell them that no, Loch Ness is just a little bit further away than a short bus ride. As is always the case, when someone comes to visit you do things you wouldn't have if you're just busy with the business of getting on with living, and I feel like I've seen more of Edinburgh in the last week than I have in the past three months.

Slightly complicating the issue was the fact that Allie was away for the first three days, having been given a surprise trip home for a week by her family. I guess that could have been awkward, but Heidi and Natalie (the two visitors) turned out to be lovely people, the best kind of guests that one could ask for. It also worked out quite well to keep me busy for the week that Allie was away- her and I don't seem to spend much time apart, we realised the other day. That's the way we seem to like it, too.

All in all, it was lovely. Slightly marred by the horrendous cold that I developed on friday, but it was discovered that without Lemsip I coughed like a dying coal miner, felt like my head was about to explode, couldn't hear anything, and could only communicate my pain to the outside world with a dry, hopeless croak. With Lemsip, however, I was a normal functioning human being again. It's also been established that if you have a cold, the best thing to do is drink it off. You're not ill if you're drunk. Fact.

Now, a wonderful week is over, my new friends are on their plane and the sun shines in through Allie's window, warm and golden as the evening rolls on in. The week is done, and I'm basking in the pleasant thought of fun times had, new friends gained, and that lovely moment when guests have gone, and you miss them, but the thought of lying down and doing nothing at all as good music plays, is the most appealing prospect of all.

valuable context

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 09:16:27 GMT

If you ever feel hard done by in life, if you ever feel like calamity and misfortune and downright unfairness seems to follow you around, I humbly beseech you to read this, and realise that the universe might not be picking on you quite as much as you think...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090324/ap_on_re_as/as_japan_bomb_victim

Musical Memes

Tue, 10 Mar 2009 17:41:19 GMT

Dave had a good idea, and I'm bored.

Guess the song, artist too.

1) I'm shining like a new dime.

2) And I know you'd hit out, if you only knew where to hit.

3) Mister, can we take your car? We're taking a girl to the resovoir.

4) Don't worry, be happy, things'll get better naturally.

5) I just want to be your lover, no matter how it ends.

6) I became a man when I first saw my mother fall.

7) I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you're gonna die.

8) Vandalism's fun when there's nothing to do, break a few things, say it
wasn't you.

9) There could be an idiot on the road, what if there's someone overtaking?

10) If they follow you, don't look back.

Wedding bells are a beautiful sound...

Mon, 23 Feb 2009 18:32:33 GMT

I'm a romantic. I love weddings. Other people's weddings have been among the happiest days of my life, so far, and I had another one on saturday.

Chris, who some may remember from Swansea as the Bulldozer Puppy, got married in a church in Oxford, not far from my first home in England, and the Chapel where my Father was married two years ago. Chris was amongst my closest friends at school, and one of the guitarists in the first band I was ever in.

After several years of wandering around our school and Oxfordshire environs talking earnestly about history, politics, philosophy, art, Therapy? B-sides and how no-one at our school understood how hard it was being us, I left for Swansea University. A year later I was overjoyed when he came to Swansea too. He then complained about the city for three full years. Possibly, getting a house just next to the Prison wasn't the wisest of choices.

We were in a band there too, and I spent many late nights up at his house in Hendrefoilan playing guitar and arguing with him till 2am. Once our arguments reached an advanced stage, I did a dissertation based on them. It was the best discussion group I could have had during my degree, because my coursemates wouldn't have stopped the argument to go see late night showings of the Exorcist, or to watch lightning out at sea from the beachfront.

He was a huge part of my time at Swansea, and though I've seen less of him recently, he's always been amongst my favourite people in the world.

From what I've seen of his wife, Phillippa, she's equally lovely. Apparently, he proposed to her in Paris.

Through the medium of Travel Scrabble.

He's a legend.

I like it when good things happen to good people.

ooh, such a good time...

Fri, 16 Jan 2009 12:41:56 GMT

Last night saw my second ever trip to Glasgow, this time to see the Mighty Boosh at the SECC. It was, well, remarkable. The show lasted about three hours and really hit home to me that there just isn't anyone quite like them around, and perhaps, well, perhaps there hasn't been anything like them before, either. Maybe Python?

The thing that make the Boosh so special is their versatility. They can do whatever the hell they want, and frequently do. They do things which shouldn't be funny, but because it's them, they are.

The closest thing I can compare to them is maybe Bill Bailey, who's done the comedy/music thing really well indeed. He's a solo act, though, and he doesn't have the sketches, characters, and ridiculously good band that they do at his disposal.

There's something amazing about watching an hour an a half of character sketches, all really good, then an interval, a half-hour 'play' which morphed into a gig that was more entertaining than most 'proper' bands manage.

It didn't hurt that for that hell-raising, punked-up 'gig,' everyone was dressed in bright floral dresses, either.

somewhere, out in the vast empty chasms of his brain, Keanu drew his plans against us

Thu, 11 Dec 2008 09:35:40 GMT

Yesterday, someone at work made my whole damn week.

In the metro yesterday morning, there was a front-page, mock-headline advert for 'The Day The Earth Stood Still,' treating the events of the film as a news story. There was also a huge disclaimer in the photo of a giant ball hovering over a station, stating 'This is an Advertisment.'

One of my workmates missed this, however, and got a little worried. Apparently she checked page two, going 'well, if it's a wind-up, it'll say there,' and it didn't. She then thought 'I wonder if we'll get the day off work, if aliens are attacking,' but figured 'I guess the buses are still going, and there isn't a ship over Edinburgh,' but something was bothering her.

'If it was real, wouldn't it have been on GMTV?'

I don't do memes, generally. this one makes me laugh, though...

Wed, 12 Nov 2008 12:59:53 GMT

If you saw ME in a police car, what would you think I got arrested for? Answer me, then if you want, post to your own journal and see how many crimes you get accused of.

Seems only fair after I commented on Yorkie's one.

Thank you, America

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 07:46:27 GMT

I had this feeling last night, a bit like that moment right before you lean in to kiss someone for the first time and are pretty sure you know how it's going to go and you think it's going to be fantastic. Still, there's that moment of doubt. Something could still go horribly wrong. You could have got it wrong.

But it didn't. I jut loaded up the BBC website this morning, and found that Americans made the right choice.

Terrible Grinning Lizard Man isn't the most powerful man on the face of the earth. Friendly Grinning Big-Eared Unity Man is.

Thank fuck.

woo science!

Wed, 15 Oct 2008 07:54:53 GMT

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/7575744.stm

I have to admit to being slightly disappointed by the actual content of this. Still, I think the music they use is FANTASTIC.

ooh, look at this

Mon, 13 Oct 2008 11:12:27 GMT

http://tom-photo-tales.livejournal.com

The more people I tell about it, the more I have to keep up my target of one of these a day...

His purple prose just gives him away...

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 23:53:21 GMT

Andy Yorke is one of the most overlooked and under-rated songwriters of his generation. His band, the Unbelievable Truth, were a big soundtrack to my university experience, and their last ever gig at Oxford's Zodiac Club was one of my favourite gigs ever, secondl only to perhaps that Glastonbury gig in 1997 where the headliners were Ra-... Oh, never mind.

That's been the problem for Andy, forever, really. Imagine that you were a fucking good chef, and your older brother was Gary Rhodes. You know what, you'd still be a fucking good chef and I would want to eat the food you cook.

So it is with Andy Yorke and his music, though it's sometimes hard to escape the ghost of his brother, even for an ardent fan. There's a certain familiar half-sneer, a weird shake of the head that makes you think of someone else. Of course, those mannerisms are as much own as they are anyone else's. It's just a question of familiarity, that's all.

Musically, though, he's unique. A pure, powerful voice, singing very direct and specific, but at the same time touchingly universal lyrics. He's always seemed to have the knack for describing situations, especially relationship situations, with an intimate eye that makes you think of your own experience, whilst clearly singing directly specifically about things which have happened to him.

His guitar playing is minimalistic and intricate, lots of finger-picking and strange intervals, and the backing that his band (including the drummer and bassist from the Unbelievable Truth, thrillingly!) provide are versatile and restrained. Case in point, Roy (Sabai's resident bass-playing genius) was very excited to notice that the bassist had amongst his set-up, a huge whopping great Distortion pedal, and kept waiting for the rock-out.

Never happened. What the bassist did do was a looping, echoing sustained tone throughout a whole song, adding depth and texture to the sound whilst crouched over his sound board. Then, when that was in place, he left it going, picked up a drumstick and started to tap out a simple beat on a cymbal, adding to the drummer's part perfectly.

The drummer too, is one of the best players I've ever seen, and it surprised me how much I try to play like him, still. He does things that I might one day manage to pull off on a kit, and he's also restrained enough to just simply play something that will work and offers a sound foundation to deliver the song.

The whole thing was presented with a modesty, and a simple humble charm- Andy Yorke seemed genuinely amazed that people like his music, and when I went up to him afterwards and made a tit of myself, calling him a god-like genius, and raving about how awesome he was, he just went 'oh, cheers, yes, it's nice to be called a god-like genius, I guess. thanks, yeah, oh yeah, he's a good drummer, yes. err, yeah, cheers. Glad you liked it.'

Nice bloke. Long may he continue to excel, in his own quiet way.

People down south, go see him! he's heading your way!

Hey everybody...

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:06:15 GMT

look what I found when looking for the Unbelievable Truth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MHcUTNre2oI&feature=related

This weekend I have been mostly...

Mon, 06 Oct 2008 11:19:11 GMT

Hoing for long walks along the Innocent railway, and taking pictures of mushrooms in the rain.

Talking nonsense to people on the internet. Apparently, Rhinestone capes are where the money is, and said money is going to be spent on a giant golden plane full of blackjack and hookers.

Watching Jonny Depp summoning the devil.

Being driven around deserted roads at 2am having german trance music played at me.

Eating tasty breakfast.

Making Mushroom Stroganoff from scratch.

Making mix CDs as an excuse to rummage through my record collection.

All in all, not bad.

Torchwood: Lost Souls. Or 'Captain Jack and the Higgs Boson'

Sun, 14 Sep 2008 10:53:05 GMT

'Oh captain Jack, is that...'

'Yes. It's the Higgs Boson.'

'It's beautiful!'

'It's life. And it's inside all of us.'

LAME.

Sun, 14 Sep 2008 00:39:20 GMT

One day I will learn not to be online at stupid o'clock in the morning looking at things that I really don't need to look at.

No, not pron. though I would understand pron a bit better than the page of Complicated Maths About the LHC I stumbled across. My brain hurts, now.

my goodness, I am drunk. having a laptop that lets me access the net again after ages without is such a boon to the procrastinating wastrel.

Good night world.

Oh, what merry nonsense I type. Oh, how I sometimes regret the foolish things that computers let me do.

I must go to bed and have a good long think. And a sleep. And then perhaps cake. And chocolate. MM, chocolate. I love chocolate. Brown. mm, brownies.

I don't think this is 'writing more.'

God damn it, why are my housemates asleep? We were having a really good conversation an hour ago about the scottish enlightenment, and multi-disciplinary science.

Ooh.

I can still type multi-disciplinary.

I must be a bit more awake than I think I am.

I'll probably even remember this.

I don't get drunk much, it's probably obvious.
Still, it'll all make more sense in the morning.